Just when you were convinced that he was a benevolent fellow, here comes the Passive Vandal, nurturing from your energy.
He’s moved in.
You try and knock him out, but his techniques are more sophisticated than yours. Hope starts to fade away.
He’s got the remote control for the most expensive screen you have ever purchased.
You’re body is strangely high on his poison, for he’s around the flat like a ghost who has come back to life.
Yes he spoils your dishes, steals your friends, but you have started to enjoy his company….
Now you carry his surname, like a pact with the most notorious californian call girl, you can’t find your clothes in this mess… look! he has bought you a new pair of ultra luxurious pijamas!
And sometimes, your tummy wishes The Passive Vandal would move to the neighbours flat next door…. so you arrange blind dates for them…
Didn’t work. The intruder keeps the flat keys now.
But then one day, just when you thought you had exhausted the last penny on your credit card for a lousy bottle of whisky, lightning comes from the skies; a good old friend heard of your misery, and moved a string for you…
You can’t look into the eyes of The Passive Vandal… but you shout, “my life does not belong to you!”
After three weeks of readjustment which taste like rehab, you wonder where this sneaky fellow is… he has taken with him the remote control, thank Goodness, but he’s not around anymore.
Years of good deeds have paid, you got to know a little more of the human race, and… at last! Farewell to The Passive Vandal!
“Orecchia” is the name given to this talisman mannequin. Mannequins are not humans, yet their resemblance and function to humans sometimes add a curious tag onto fashion people’s lives.
Here’s the story around “Orecchia”.
Assembled in a South-east Asian factory, with a default- a missing ear- she was very soon dumped in the staff room at Divino’s Milan high Street store, where she met Ursula. Ursula. What a funny, sweet, innocent character.
Ursula was the new customer services assistant who made of “Orecchia” a live personality: disguising “Orecchia” with eccentric party attires, spraying the new perfumes on her just to test them first, and sitting her often at the bosses chair with a quirky pose… she had blended the mannequin into the family. She even made her some coffee which she then sipped when all the coffee was finished and no one was looking….
“If this dress doesn’t look good on Orecchia, it won’t look good on anyone” became Claudia, one of Ursula’s colleagues mantra.
The shop was striving thanks to the crew’s hard work until disaster happened.
Ursula was nicely doing her nails during her break, when Lucas, her crush, stormed into the staff room, with music playing on his smartphone, and cried
” would you dance with me?”
A flare lit in Ursula’s heart and she forgot she was painting her nails, and jumped into Lucas arms.
He pushed her briskly aside and said
“Not you, Orecchia!!!”
His new seasons company t-shirt was spoilt with lacquer, but he didn’t notice til later.
Ursula went to the show room before he could see her crying and carried on working… working? The entire new spring collection that came in the day before was definitely ruined with nail lacquer!
The boss only noticed when it was too late and a glamourous customer asked
“Can I have this item, but with no paint on it…. please?”
Ursula got the sack before the shop closed, she didn’t want to bare the sight of Lucas, and the boss gave her Orecchia to take as a goodwill gift.
Ursula would never forget how stupid she felt walking around Milan with a broken mannequin and her nails looking like she came from the frontline.
The next weeks to come were to be forgotten: whenever she bumped into one of the shops staff they would say something like ” how’s Orecchia? We miss her!” or even “did you find a good manicurist?”
Ursula spent her time putting and undoing make up on the mannequin’s face, and posting the pictures on Instagram. It relieved the pain….until one morning she got a call.
It was from a beauty firm’s recruiter, he had accidentally landed on her Instagram page and had become mesmerized by her make up skills.
“Would you like to come in at 11AM for a casual interview?”
Accidentally her boiler didn’t work that day and she had to have a cold shower. Then she tried her best clothes on Orecchia, first, and remembered Claudia s mantra, “if it doesn’t look good on orecchia it doesn’t look good on anyone”.
She attended the interview in her favourite jeans and- she got the job!
One week later, while she was happily training with facials, the receptionist came up with a bunch of purple roses, and said there was a gentleman who wanted to see her.
She uneasily remembered that music….. It was the song Lucas was playing when disaster happened at Divinos’.
Lucas eyes were not begging, they were serious.
“Ursula, I’m so sorry, I have no words…. I ‘ve been promoted last week to become the manager of the store, but I don’t feel good about myself until I repair the damage I did to you…. I am ready to dance here with you, you can do my make up, stuff nail varnish onto my clothes, anything…. sorry I’m not good at first dates…. will you dance?”
“Ummm… thought Ursula for a split second…. I can’t dance right now, but maybe do the manicure on you?”
Auburn's Creative Palpitations 